How inner transformation redefines success, value, and visibility.
In three days, we will be at the end of April, and I'll be writing my One Pager for the month, reflecting on how I grew, what changes and progress I made towards my goals, and who I became this month.
I'm feeling a little apprehensive. April, the first month of our second quarter of 2025, represented the next phase of my year-long experiment of inner transformation.
The first quarter was a series of ego deaths, consistently allowing, accepting, and embracing significant parts of my identity to be let go. In particular, the part of myself that had always felt she needed to prove herself. The part attached to the significance of achievements and the validation of self through external recognition.
Even though I'm highly self-aware and keep my ego well in check, it was powerful to see how much conditioning I had to unravel emotionally, mentally, and physically from my body.
The safety of being seen in a certain way, and the behaviours driven by external conditioning of what is attractive and what is not, were powerful to witness.
I saw how easily my brain would start to worry about my credibility if I began sharing parts of myself usually hidden in my journals, rather than curated for the world to see and judge.
I leaned in anyway.
This is what inner transformation involves.
It's uncomfortable, scary, and hard to sustain, because every part of your body starts screaming that it's unsafe to be seen as you are. Unsafe to become the person you know yourself to be on the inside.
This year, choosing and embracing all that comes with deep inner transformation has been the biggest negotiation of my life. I'm negotiating with a counterpart - my ego - that feels threatened and scared of being discarded, and who is fighting for her life.
My negotiation counterpart is pleading with me to see things her way. She tells me she wants what I want and anchors hard into our mutual desire for safety and security.
She thinks that consistently highlighting how I'm threatening my own survival will win me over. That using fear as leverage will be enough to have power over me.
In this ongoing negotiation, I have to take multiple timeouts, to reconnect with what is truly valuable to me and remind myself what the truest essence of this dialogue with my ego is about.
It’s to live a life well lived and to avoid having any of the top five regrets of the dying, as written about by Bronnie Ware.
The top five regrets people reported at the end of their lives:
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"I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me."
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"I wish I hadn't worked so hard."
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"I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings."
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"I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends."
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"I wish I had let myself be happier."
My 2025 year of inner transformation seeks to address all of these.
Last week, I acknowledged I wanted to make some moves before the end of April. To use the time I had left to take small but steady, gentle yet powerful, scary, and yet reassuringly safe steps. Not as a performance for others, but as a journey of pure presence with myself.
Here are some of the steps I took:
1. Changing my company name on LinkedIn
My company has always been SimplyGlin Pty Ltd, but I traded under two business names: Heart of Human and The Value Negotiator.
Because I no longer want to separate my identity across different brands, I'm coming home to SimplyGlin - so I can offer all of myself in my work.
I'll still be doing the same work: training negotiation skills, facilitating self-leadership workshops, and consulting on business growth.
For me, it all comes down to the same essence - who we are being determines the outcomes we get.
2. Restarting writing under SimplyGlin on Substack
I used to have a personal blog website called SimplyGlin, which I took down 2.5 years ago and moved the blogs onto Substack.
I allowed myself to pick up where I left off, writing blog SG145 & SG146 (having previously written 144 blogs under SimplyGlin).
It felt like a gentle homecoming. I currently have two subscribers, and I'm one of them, so it definitely wasn't writing for performance!
3. Standing up to aggressive communication
I addressed an individual whose communication style on email had been aggressive, punitive, and threatening.
I called them out on their behaviour. They didn't get 'polite Glin', they didn't get 'calm Glin' - they got the Glin that was sick of trying to pacify a Rottweiler with kindness.
They got the Glin that recognised enough was enough and bore her own teeth, showing she would not stand for bullying behaviour.
All in service of one of the not-for-profit boards I am a volunteer director for.
Don't get me started on the bullshit board directors have to deal with - and the liability we take on without compensation.
Fair to say, the more I move away from the desire for 'proving' myself, the more I'm rethinking where and how I offer my time and energy in the future.
My time and energy come at a premium.
I believe there’s a better way for me to be of service to the community, one that doesn’t require accepting an unreasonable value exchange.
It’s a broken system, one I see particularly impacting women, where we’re trusted enough to do the work of directors, asked to take on personal liability, shoulder the weight of responsibility, but expected to do it for free.
All while being told that after enough unpaid roles, perhaps we'll be considered for the ones that pay.
This model might suit those who are retired and looking to give back - but for those of us in the active chapters of building our lives, careers, and contributions, the opportunity cost is significant.
I'm becoming more mindful of this.
And I'm committed to finding ways to contribute that honour both my value and my impact.
This system is just one reflection of a much bigger misunderstanding about value that runs through our world.
And that, my friend, is the biggest lie going.
No baby ever born is asked to prove themselves before they are seen as valuable.
We, as humans, need to stop believing that proving ourselves is the path to discovering our value.
It’s not.
Our value is inherent within us.
Once you see yours, it changes the game you play.
That is the real work - shifting your perspective, seeing yourself clearly in a world that can so easily minimise your essence because everyone is playing the wrong game.
My inner transformation is far from complete, but I see that I am elevating and accelerating my impact and contribution through this journey.
I am saying no more to what doesn't serve the future I'm creating.
As a result, I am hearing the signal more clearly than the noise around me.
While in the middle of every ego death I feel broken, I know the truth is I am simply becoming.
The more I allow myself to feel everything, fear, discomfort, uncertainty, and accept and embrace it, the more unstoppable I feel.
Presence with oneself versus proving is an entirely different game, but it's the only one that leads to love and peace in my heart, so that's the one I will continue to choose.
As we step into May this week:
What will you choose to leave behind in April?
What will you choose to take forward into May?
Who do you want to be in June?
Pondering these questions will help you connect to your own signal and ensure you cut away the noise in your life.
The only way to avoid regrets is to be intentional about your choices and stay present and conscious to the life you are living.
Keep going and keep growing.
Love Glin x
P.S. Three wins from my week:
1. Observing a peer make a powerful and difficult move.
I've been gently holding the mirror for peers I work with, and as I’ve been elevating my own floor, I’ve been seeking to help others do the same.
This week, I witnessed a breakthrough in a peer who is committed to making a significant impact. They took a very brave and difficult step forward.
We're all on a journey, and it's important to celebrate and acknowledge the difficult choices those around us are making.
2. Plants for my garden.
While the world loses its head on the perennial hamster wheel, I took time this weekend to buy some beautiful new plants for my garden.
I love beauty, and it made me laugh that I'm now clearly in the age bracket where weekend visits to garden centres bring great joy!
3. Deepening my Human Design practice.
I've continued deepening my Human Design practice to better understand myself, and this week, I shared insights with a negotiation client on how they could leverage their Human Design to negotiate more powerfully with their partner.
Their partner's over-caution had been holding back the growth of their business.
My client had a breakthrough in their communication, and early signs suggest they now have a way forward that works for them both.
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